5 reasons why parents should drop the book and just get wild! (you knowyou want to...)

Nope, it's just not the same thing, in my (rarely) humble opinion, there's a huge difference between telling a story, and playing the CD of someone telling a story, or plunking our child in front of a DVD, even if that CD is from a super creative parents' choice award winning storyteller, even if that DVD is an artistic Iranian cartoon of a wonderfully multicultural tale.  Now, I'm not saying these activities are worthless, but even though we'd love to think that they are just as good as a parent closing the book and creatively telling a story...it's NOT.

Here are a few reasons why parents should tell stories to their children themselves:

1. To be a creative role model

Telling a story is different from reading one.

The storyteller is free to use:

• body language
• voices
• facial expressions.  
• objects from the room

In short the storyteller plays with the story.
What a creative act!
And what better present can a parent possibly give to his/her children than to display his/her creativity?

We often complain that school kills creativity.  In fact there are even tests that show it does.  A study has shown that elementary school students perform much higher on standardized creativity tests than high school students, and when faced with such results we are quick to point our finger to the classroom and say:

 "YOU YOU did this to MY child!"  

And I'll have to agree that schools with their standardized tests may have something to do with it....

But another factor may be that many children when they look around have a hard time finding adult role models who are creative and playful.  This, in turn, gives them the message that creative playfulness is the stuff of childhood, a fuzzy warm layer they are supposed to shed if they ever want to be taken seriously.

So? If we want our children to believe that adults can, need to and are creative, let's tell them stories, and let's go wild with our evening storytelling sessions, because then our children will know that creativity is a real world value.
And it is!  More than ever creativity is a quality which is required of adults in every aspects our their lives, and it will be even more the case for our children.

2. To fill the story with teaching metaphors and healing images

Storytelling language is not the same as written language.  

When we drop the book and start telling from our heart, there are many transformations that happen in the language we use.
The words:

"The young princess had blond hair that came down to her waist"

become:
"Do you see the gold on the lamp there?  That's the exact color of the princess' hair, just like gold, and guess how long her hair was?  Down to there?  Oh no! Much longer than that! Look it went down to...there"

Now I know this "oral" version doesn't really translate well on this written blog, but what I mean to say is that it involves lots of pointing on the body, and looking at our environment to create comparisons with visual objects.  Which means that the story is not just told on the conceptual level, it includes a lot more kinesthetic and visual references.

Why is this important?  New studies about language show that when you create metaphors and comparaisons language affects you on a deeper level because it involves different areas of your brain.  The more senses you include in the game, the deeper the effect of the story.  Therefore children will remember and learn more from the story.

3. To turn our children into heroes

Custom made is always better, so let's get personal!

In the story we tell, we can change the name of the characters, the wise old guide is no longer named Olaf but Mr. Benson, yes that teacher he loves so much.  And what the second daughter asks for may not be a golden necklace anymore, maybe it becomes the bike that your child has been asking for.

Then the bridge between the magical symbolic world of stories and your child's life is easier to climb.

The stories give new meaning to his or her life.  It also allows the child to replace his or her life's experience within a different context, to see that his teacher is not unlike the wise old bearded magician.  Through this metaphor you invite your child to look at his own world through different glasses.

  Every story is designed for the listener to put himself in the hero's shoes, and children love being the heroes of the stories they listen to. 
But it is something special to have one's parent actually rename the hero for us, thus actually acknowledging that we are the hero of this, and our own stories.

4. Stop the visual imprisonment, free their minds.

In today's world children's eyes are full.  

It's as if the world was trying to get to their brains through their eyes (OK, I know it's a little disgusting as far as metaphors go, but I'll stand by it, yes I will!) our culture is overly visual, it takes our children's imagination and keeps them hostage.

Stories are a wonderful occasion to tip the balance the other way.
When we tell stories, we offer sounds and words, then, in exchange, we ask them to create all the visuals in their heads.

Storytelling is an interactive act of group creation.

 

Listeners are the directors in this film, in their heads they cast the princess and shoot the scenes.  It's so important for children to be given spaces without imposed visual cues.

 

So let's free their imagination.

5. Have a family ritual.

Thank you daddy!

The other day I found this old volume, tattered pages... 
Reading the stories sent me with a flash on an amazing time travel!
These were the stories that my dad used to tell us.
I have no idea where he found this book, nor why he chose them, the stories were pretty religious, each of them start and end with a religious precept like:

"thus one should never forget, as it is written, that all believers should give to the poor at least a quarter of their earnings, and woe to the characters of this story who had to learn it the hard way"
(it's not a literal translation, but I swear it's not far...)

I remembered each and everyone of the stories so well.  But I had never heard them with the sanctimonious tone that the written version had....
And that's because it's not who my dad is, and that's not how he told them.
He told them his way, with his heart, and that's how I remember them.  The evenings we spent with my sisters listening to storie are more precious to me than anything else, and today we still tell each other stories as a family, stories of life, things we read or hear, and tales, many tales. 

We are connected in this practice of active imagination called storytelling. 

 

Something that could never have been created with an evening spent in front of the TV.